Fuck Cancer!

It's been a while since I wrote a personal blog.  I'm not really sure why I'm even writing this.

Let me start by saying... this isn't about me, I don't want or need sympathy for this.  It's just a way for me to deal with some of the feelings I'm having at the moment.  

As some of you already know, I have a friend who is currently battling cancer.  He's 34 years old, and has bowel cancer.  He's undergoing treatment, but this doesn't seem to be working as the doctors would hope.

We found out, yesterday, that his cancer has grown.

My friend is funny, intelligent, loving, caring, and generally an all-round nice guy.  He's that person that no one has a bad word to say about.  He's married to a loving husband, they had just been accepted to progress to adopt a baby, when he was diagnosed.

He has a brilliant, supportive family.  His parents accepted him from day one, and always have been, and still are, a major part of his life.

So, basically... I'm angry.  I'm hurt.  I'm sad.  I'm really fucking pissed off.

My heart feels like it's breaking for them all.

I don't know how to even begin to think about what might happen.  I'm losing my mind over it all.

I'm continuing to plod through my day to day life.  Dealing with unimportant shit.  Making mountains out of mole hills... when really, none of it matters.

It's a times like this that I really miss hugs.  Having a special someone reach out, grab hold of me, and just tell me that they're there.  

Now, of course, this is SL.  I'm lucky.  I have someone special in my SLife, and I consider him part of my RL too.  However, hugs are impossible... and that is really fucking difficult at times.  No ones fault, just the reality of our situation.

Anyway... as I said, this is not about me.  I am continuing to help my friend, wherever I can.  He told me that some friends have withdrawn.  I understand that... none of us really know what to say.  Guess what?  Me either!  We mainly just talk about everything other than his cancer.  All of the mundane stuff... and obviously cute guys on TV.

So, I guess I've rambled on enough... I'll leave you with this one thing.  If you know someone in your life who is struggling, whether it is cancer or something else.  

Reach out.  Make time.  Be there.

Jay <3